Thirty-One Nights of Questions · Love-Hate
Where hate and love overlap
A journal with one question each night, filling in the days one by one.
The sets are divided by "what lens shall I look at myself through" — Me · Love · Love-and-Hate · Food · Life, five in all.
This sheet is "Love-and-Hate" among them. It deals with the places where closeness breeds resentment, but asks in the direction of easing the heart, not of blame.
How it works
- Before sleep, read the question in that night's box.
- Write whatever comes to mind, within two lines. It doesn't have to be long.
- If you note the date in its box, you'll see the path when you look back later.
- It's fine if you skip a night. Just pick up where you left off.
When · with whom
A night journal to write alone. Suits a time when someone keeps weighing on your mind.
Questions about "Love-and-Hate"
- Is there someone close to you who leaves you with mixed feelings?
- When did it start getting complicated?
- When you feel resentment, where does your body react first?
- What's the very first thing you do after you get angry?
- Is there a hurt you let pass without ever saying so?
- If you had said it then, what might have been different?
- Is there something you've been quietly hoping for?
- Does the other person know what you're hoping for?
- Is there a part of you that wishes them well, even while you resent them?
- Have you learned anything from someone you dislike?
- Could you have been that person to someone, too?
- Is there a habit in how you talk that pushes people away?
- What are you putting up with these days?
- How is holding it in different from letting it slide?
- Have you ever regretted losing your temper?
- Why do you think you do it again, even though you regret it?
- How long does it take you to cool off?
- Are you the one who speaks first, or the one who waits?
- Shall we think of one good thing about that person today?
- Is there a day you two laughed together?
- Has that person ever quietly done something for you?
- Could there be an effort on their part you haven't been seeing?
- When things were good between you, what were you doing together?
- To get back to that, what would need to come first?
- What's a very small thing you could do today?
- Are there relationships where keeping your distance is better?
- Can you grow apart without hating them?
- Is there someone you still feel sorry toward?
- What would you like to do with the feelings that remain?
- Could you set this down and sleep tonight?
- After thirty-one nights, do you see that person a little differently?